Update!

I was thinking the other day that I totally said that I wanted to do a race each month for a year. HA! Where was I thinking I would find the time? The last race I did was when we were still in NY. That was April. I havent done much of anything since then. I few runs here and there when I'm feeling pudgy, but nothing like a race.

Anyway, I joined the gym on base. I think I wrote about how it was free to go but if you had kids, you had to pay. I was a little upset about that cause you didn't have to pay at Quantico. You just voulnteered your time.

But, I got the punch card and this is day 3 of going. I'm loving it! The boys, not so much.. You would think they'f have a great time interacting with other kids their age and being in a place with a million toys.. but they don't. I guess thats what I get for not being more social with them. All they've known is Mommy and as soon as you take Mommy out of their sight and leave them with no one they reconize, they freeaak.

The first day, Benji was nuts. They called my name over the loud speaker when I only had about 25 minutes on the treadmill to come in and comfort him. They said it as just a precaution and that I could leave him if I wanted.. but I took him because he was hysterical and they said he was biting and kicking and I hate to be that Mom that says, "oh well.. it's your job to deal with him" So the first day was a bust.

Yesterday was about the same. I was supposed to meet my friend, Erica there but her phone broke, there for her alarm didn't go off and she didn't end up making it til 9:30 when I was just finishing.

As far as the boys, Ben screamed the whole time again. I went to check him once and take him potty. He didn't go. he just sat there. They said Noah cried a little bit but was fine after a few minutes. I stayed an hour or so and left..

Today it seemed MUCH better. Erica came with her two boys. Noah and Ben know her kids so I think it's a bit easier for them. Noah didn't cry at all. Ben was crying in the beginning and then I checked on him about a half hour into it and he was playing.. it kind of went back and forth like that all day. We were there for an hour and a half.. got a nice workout in..

I'm loving having a gym partner,(thank you Erica!) she's so motivated, too.. I love it. Keeps me motivated.

I've decided not to focus on running as much. Lets face it, I'm not exactly built to run. I enjoy it still but, there are SO Many different things to do at the gym that work SO many different body parts, why waste a half hour on a treadmill? Its okay every once in a while.. but I'm determined to learn all of the machines in that gym..

FINALLY

A gym membership! I've ben down here for 2 months and have gained some weight. I've been running here and there, but only when I feel really bad about myself. I know that the gym on base housing is free, but I've heard rumors that you had to pay for child care - which wasn't the case at Quantico. You brought your kids, and volunteered your time 3 times a month to watch other peoples kids. It was nice-

So I finally trugged the boys over and got a child care punch card. As I understand, You pay for this card. You can pay $10, $20, or $40 and you get like a meal ticket punch card. Each time you bring your kiddos, they punch your card. I bought a $20 card, which is good for 11 times of dropping  your kids off. What I didn't realize is, each kid is a punch. So when I bring both the boys, thats two punched each time. Thats a load of crap! Totally not cool. Soo, I figured it out that if I go 5 times a week, I'll have to renew my card every week. Which means, $20 each week, which adds up to about .. what, $80? Is that right?! For some reason, before I only made it out to $60.. which I still this is awful! - I've always been terrible with Math -

ANYWAY, I think thats a flipping rip off. Soo, I'm going to call Gold's Gym, down the road and ask what their rates are. This is total bologna. It would be totally cool if I didn't have any kiddos.. Id be able to get in free. But since I have two, I have to get my card punched twice.. lame.

I feel like I might as well be getting a regular gym membership - not getting any kind of deals on base..

So I'll call Gold's tomorrow and find out what their rates are. Ive heard that they're $50 WITH childcare AND TANNING..

It's been a while.

But I'm still plugging along. Although it's been hard to get back into the groove after moving down to NC, I still have that urge to get out there in run. I took about 3 weeks off, and then decided I needed to get back into it. At first, I could seriously run one mile. It was pathetic. But today, I finally ran over 3 miles. Whew.

Let me just say, no matter how shitty I'm feeling, if I go for a run, I feel 100 times betetr afterwards. I love the feeling after a run and I can understand why people get addicted to it. Like today, I was feeling fat and I had a massivr headache.. I went for a run, I feel better about myself and my headache is gone.. I may not be the best runner, I'm surely not the fastest but, I enjoy it and I am always proud to say I'm a runner, and hopefully always will be.

Okay so, as far as weight goes though, I'm getting heavy again. I'm up to 132ish. YUCK. I just wish I could stay 125. That would be so perfect. I hate being so self conscience about my weight. It's so hard to go from 180 to 125 and then fluctuate between 125 and 135. I just wish I could get it under control and keep it under control.

I'm so totally rambling today - but you know, I can't go out of the house in a bathing suit unless Aaron takes a picture of me. I have to look at that picture and decide weather or not I'm skinny enough to go out in a bikini.. If I think I look fat, I'll put a pair of shorts and a tank top on.. if I think I look okay, I'll wear the bikini but when I get to the beach, I'll keep my shorts on.. I'm so selfconsciencde about my theighs and butt.. thats kind of sick, right?

I hope some day I can get over it and feel comfortable enough in my own skin to bare it all..